Using a person’s chosen name and correct pronouns is considered an important part of showing respect. However, traditional assumptions about gender can sometimes create difficult situations, especially in healthcare environments.
This was a painful experience for Bennett Kaspar-Williams, a 37-year-old transgender man who gave birth to his son, Hudson, through a cesarean delivery in October 2020. Although he identifies as male and uses he/them/his pronouns, hospital employees repeatedly referred to him as a “mother,” which caused significant emotional distress during an already sensitive and life-changing moment.
Kaspar-Williams began his transition in 2014 after publicly coming out as transgender in 2011. He later underwent chest surgery but decided not to have genital surgery, meaning he was still able to become pregnant and carry a child. While welcoming his son brought him tremendous happiness, the pregnancy and delivery process also created emotional challenges because of the way others viewed and described him.
Even though his medical records reflected his male identity, some healthcare workers continued to rely on traditional assumptions that childbirth is only associated with women.
After becoming a father, Kaspar-Williams began sharing his experience to encourage broader conversations about separating the ability to give birth from ideas about gender. He explained that not everyone who gives birth identifies as a woman, and not every woman experiences parenthood in the same way.
For him, the most difficult part of pregnancy was not the physical process itself, but being repeatedly placed into the identity of “mother,” a role that did not reflect how he understood himself. He said becoming pregnant became possible emotionally when he learned to separate the biological process of carrying a child from society’s expectations about femininity.
His story has also been compared with that of Freddy McConnell, another transgender man who gave birth in 2019 and later appeared in a documentary about his journey.
McConnell, who experienced gender dysphoria from a young age, explained that transitioning helped him live more comfortably as himself. When he chose to have a child to maintain a biological connection, he viewed the decision practically—as using his body’s ability to achieve a personal goal.
Unlike Kaspar-Williams, McConnell described his medical experience as more supportive, saying healthcare workers treated him with understanding and compassion, making the birth experience feel meaningful and validating.
